…That’s How I Connect

Have you ever had one of those great nights where you sit around with family or friends and just swap stories? You know, those great stories that have become legendary and can simply be referred to as “The one about falling in the lake” or “The one about your Halloween costume.” The truth is, we love telling tales and bringing others on the journey we’ve been on.

On this page, you’ll find a number of individuals who have stories to share. Stories of connecting in community and seeing lives transformed. Stories of individuals taking their next right steps. And stories of people connecting in Christ-centered relationships.

Ame See Connect Group

Occupation: Young Life Staff Member

Currently Playing on iPod: Ellie Holcomb, Blind Pilot, and Ray LaMontagne

Four months after coming to Summit, Ame See knew that her next right step was to join a Connect group. The problem was, because of her job, she only had one free night a week to dedicate to a group. Her goal was to find a group of “young professionals” that met on Thursday nights. She said a prayer to God as she walked into Group Night. Lo and behold, she found exactly what she was looking for… and more.

Now, a year later, Ame couldn’t imagine life without her group. “For a long time I went to church but I never felt part of a church,” she says. “Being in a Connect group gave me a place to belong and a sense of ownership. This is the first time I’ve actually enjoyed being a part of a church community.”

Ame is on staff with Young Life. Being in professional ministry can be mentally and emotionally draining, especially when working with teenagers. Ame finds solace in her group. “In my job I’m the one always listening to other people. My group is a place I can be listened to and be myself,” she says. Spending time with her group reenergizes her. She can be poured into and, in turn, be ready to pour into the kids she works with.

Ame was blessed to find exactly what she was looking for in a Connect group on her first try. She realizes that this is not always the case, but implores people to trust God as they begin their search for a group. “I think you have to be a little bit vulnerable, but I think that’s what God asks us to do. God didn’t create us to do life alone. He created us to be in community,” she says.

For Ame See, her group provides her a place to rejuvenate and get a clearer image of God.

And that’s how she connects.

Bill Behr Connect Group

Occupation: Owner of Tile & Stone Business

Favorite Hobbies: Fishing, Traveling

If you were to ask Bill Behr “Why should I be in a Summit Connect group?”, the response you may receive is “Why shouldn’t you be in a Summit Connect group?” Summit Connect has played a pivotal role in helping Bill to develop deep friendships at Summit.

Bill’s group includes people in all stages of life. Bill understands why someone might prefer a group that has a common thread (married couples, singles, college-aged, etc), but he enjoys being able to learn from people who are in a different place in life than him. “I get a lot of wisdom from people who have gone through situations I haven’t gone through before.”

Bill has experienced significant growth in his walk with God thanks to his Connect group. They keep each other accountable with staying in God’s Word throughout the week and pray for one another regularly. “My Connect group keeps me grounded in my faith on a weekly basis,” says Bill, who beams with enthusiasm as he talks about his group. “Life can weigh you down. Being in a smaller group helps.”

If there’s one thing Bill wants people to know, it’s that Connect groups are not just a “Bible Study.” Yes, groups do learn about God’s Word (Bill’s group recently went through the Dignity Serves study and loved it), but it’s a lot more than that. “Connect groups are meant to be a group of people who do life together,” Bill says. “If it’s only a ‘Bible Study’, you’re missing out.”

Bill loves his group. You can tell just by talking to him for ten seconds. In fact, after being interviewed he said, “Please make sure everyone knows that all the people in my small group are awesome individuals and I am blessed to be in a group with them. Really blessed.”

Bill Behr loves the authenticity, the accountability, and the community found within his group. To him, the purpose of a Connect group is to “form a smaller community within the bigger community of the church.”

Bill and his group have done that. And that’s how he connects.

Bill & Carolyn Salter Connect Group

Hobbies: Dining out; Creating and appreciating art

For Bill and Carolyn Salter, Summit Connect presents a unique opportunity to create meaningful friendships and impact the world around them. The Salters believe that when these two elements come together in a Connect group it forms a “spiritual family” among its members. “There is momentum in the collective effort of people gathering together for a ‘spiritual’ purpose, and God’s Spirit is the power that is operating there,” says Bill.

Bill and Carolyn love developing deep friendships with other people. They are big believers in the “iron sharpens iron” principle. “Any time you choose to involve yourself for 12 to 18 months with a group of people, sharing in their hurts, joys, celebrations, births, deaths, dreams, and prayer requests, you will be changed,” says the couple. “It is the natural progression that the Lord brings about; it’s called love.”

This love is displayed in many ways, both within and outside the group. The Salters love when their group does niceSERVE together because it is a way to express love and bless other people out in the community. One way that the group displays love among each other is through prayer. “The prayer request time has become really meaningful,” says Bill. “Yes, sometimes tearful, and always refining our individual perspectives on what we really need to be thankful about!”

Bill and Carolyn’s desire is that everyone would have the kind of church experience that they have. They are desperate for people to experience the rewards of getting to know the other members in Christ’s family. Simply showing up at a building and hearing a message for an hour a week is not what Jesus had in mind when He built His church. “Life is first and far most about our relationship with Christ Jesus, but then it is also about our relationships with others; and the depth of this relationship is something we get to choose!” they say enthusiastically.

Bill and Carolyn have decided to choose to create a spiritual family comprised of deep, meaningful friendships. And that’s how they connect.

Dru Dalton Connect Group

Occupation: Business Owner

Favorite Pandora Stations: Explosions In The Sky, Tenth Avenue, One Republic, The Fray, Citizen Cope, Pinback

Dru Dalton thought he did not have enough time to be involved in a Summit Connect group. It seemed like a good idea, in theory, but just something he was too busy for. After being involved in a group, however, he now says that he doesn’t have the time to not make time for his group!

“The relationships which have developed from my Connect group are life-altering,” says Dru, who is in an all men’s Connect group. Dru is one of the younger guys in the group, and he loves gaining wisdom from the other members. In fact, he was able to lean on them during an unexpected event in his life.

“My 24 year old younger brother was recently diagnosed with testicular cancer,” he says. “I immediately took it to my group. It turns out that another guy’s younger brother fought through the same cancer a decade ago. We talked and I left the group that night with far more peace than I had walked in with. I can take anything to them and always have more peace on the issue after our discussion.” This kind of brotherly love is what makes being in a Connect group so life-altering for Dru.

A businessman at heart, Dru compares life principles to business principles. “In real estate, they say location, location, location. In life, it’s relationship, relationship, relationship,” he explains. “I’ve always loved Proverbs 15:22: ‘Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisors they succeed’. A Connect group is a place to seek wise counsel from those who walk with the same guiding light.”

What is Dru’s favorite part of group time? That’s easy: “The cookies,” he says with a smile, and then quickly adds, “Just kidding. It’s the things we discuss over the cookies. It’s hearing what God is doing in each of our lives.”

Dru’s story highlights the importance of getting into a Connect group now, even if it doesn’t seem convenient. Nobody knows when their world will be shaken, and when (not if) it does, having a support system in place is paramount. Dru has that, and he is able to be that for others as well.

And that’s how he connects.

Jason and Sheli Scarborough Marriage Prep

Hobbies: Watching old episodes of Stossel on Hulu; family bike rides in Baldwin Park.

When Jason and Sheli Scarborough signed up to be a mentor couple for Summit’s Marriage Prep class, they went in expecting to be an encouragement to couples considering marriage. Indeed they were, but they were also surprised at how much they got out of the experience.

Marriage Prep classes are highly focused Summit Connect groups. Couples who are considering marriage (or, who are newly married) are assigned a mentor couple to help them walk through a set curriculum for 12 weeks. After the 12 weeks end, couples are encouraged to continue “doing life together”.

“Our Marriage Prep class has been ‘officially’ over for a while now but we still get to see the couples we mentored on a regular basis,” says Jason and Sheli. “We’ve met up for coffee, breakfast, and a game night to keep plugged into each other’s lives.”

Jason in particular has discovered that a mentorship can work both ways. One of the young men he mentored in the arena of marriage is now mentoring him in fitness and exercise. He has lost 25 pounds, and that never would have happened without the relationship he formed through his Marriage Prep Connect group.

The Scarboroughs also think being a mentor couple strengthened their own marriage. “We had a chance to discuss some things we hadn’t thought about in a long time, like personality types, communication, and future hopes and expectations,” says Jason. “We had a great time investing in the other couples but the best part was how our own marriage was enriched!”

Jason and Sheli believe that joining a Marriage Prep Connect group would be a right next step for any couple who desires to have a God-honoring marriage. Engaged or newly married couples will have a chance to be mentored by experienced couples, and experienced couples will have their marriage strengthened as well. Most importantly, couples will get to engage in real community and develop deep, meaningful relationships with other couples. That is the goal of Summit Connect as a whole, and what Jason and Sheli treasure the most about the experience…

… And that’s how they connect.

Matt Carpenter reGROUP

Occupation: Sales Designer for a Custom Cabinetry Firm

Favorite Movie: Gladiator

How do you connect in Christ-centered community during a season of brokenness and trials? For Matt Carpenter the answer is clear – get involved in reGROUP.

Matt started attending reGROUP in January of 2009 after realizing that something in his life wasn’t as it should be. “At the time I was escaping a lot,” he says. “I was pretty hurt and kind of lost. I hadn’t really made God the center of my life for a long, long time. I had a false view of God.”

As Matt began to walk through the reGROUP process and engage in community, he experienced healing like never before. He revisited his story in the safety of his group, and soon realized he had a distorted image of God. “I had an image of God and Christ that I had built up that worked for me. I started tearing down those walls and for the first time in my life really understood God’s love.”

Matt invested in the other guys in his group and they invested in him. Together they encouraged each other, celebrated victories, and held each other accountable. For Matt, that’s what a healthy friendship is all about.

If you are longing for this kind of safe community, reGROUP may be your next step. If you are apprehensive about it, Matt’s advice would be to commit to going for a short period of time. “Try it for six weeks. Pray about it and come every week for six weeks. Just come and try it out…” he says.

Matt walked into the doors of reGROUP without knowing anyone. Today, a year and a half later, he has close relationships with at least 30 people and continues to build community each week.

And that’s how Matt connects.

Sid & Kathy Mair Connect Group

Favorite Activities: water skiing, scuba diving, boating, traveling, walking, family time, and hosting Summit parties.

Sid and Kathy Mair are Summit Connect pros… In fact, they got involved from the very beginning – when it was originally called Community Development Initiative – about five years ago! The Mairs jumped in and led a group that lasted for 18 months. Ever since then, it has been their passion to connect in Christ-centered relationships and help others to do the same.

Sid and Kathy believe that the best way to develop real relationships at Summit is through Summit Connect. “We had been involved with other ministries at Summit and we didn’t necessarily get the continuous connection with people until we started with Summit Connect,” says Sid.

If the Mairs could offer one piece of advice to someone looking to join a Connect group, it would be to stick with it. “The important thing is that you don’t give up on Summit Connect,” says Sid. “Make sure you spend the time to get to know people. ‘Date’ or check it out for 8 weeks, but don’t give up if it doesn’t work out.”

Kathy thinks that leading a group is another great option for someone who hasn’t found a group yet. “If you’ve had a hard time finding a group you connect well with, consider leading a group,” she says. “Maybe there are people in the church who are looking for a group just like the one you have in mind!”

Sid and Kathy, who now attend Summit Waterford, are in the process of splitting up their group so that it can multiply into more groups, allowing more people to get connected. They are committed to helping as many people as they can plug into Christ-centered community. One of their greatest joys is developing tight-knit friendships with people through Summit Connect.

God created us to be in relationships. Sid and Kathy Mair have invested time and energy into developing authentic friendships.

And that’s how they connect.

Tonya Lundeen reGROUP

Occupation: Insurance Saleswoman, Bookkeeper for a rescue outreach mission, and, most importantly, a full-time Mom.

What’s on your iPod right now?: Well I don’t have an iPod…but I do have an MP3 player and Daughtry was playing last I was listening.

“Intimacy” and “Vulnerability”. Those are the two words that come to mind when Tonya Lundeen thinks about the community she has built through reGROUP. “I started on this journey of healing with a group of strangers,” she says. “For some of us, the only thing we had in common is that we knew there had to be something more in life than what we were experiencing.”

When Tonya first started attending reGROUP, she thought that she had messed up God’s plan for her life and was beyond redemption. Through the encouragement of her group leaders and members, however, she discovered that she was still capable of living a life full of God’s purpose. She heard stories from other members that were similar to her own and saw that they didn’t end in defeat. There was hope on the other side. Tonya learned how to apply God’s truth to every one of her stories and soon began to experience healing. “My past is now my story and my story brings glory to God. My life is full of His purpose,” she says.

Tonya’s group believes in being a “beautiful mess together”. The group bears each other’s burdens and, often times, tears are shed. But through the tears and brokenness is laughter and joy too. Tonya trusts every one of the ladies in her group, and that leads to a free heart at the end of each meeting.

Tonya believes that reGROUP could be the next right step for anyone who does not have hope, joy, or peace in any area of his or her life. The small group setting of reGROUP provides a safe place to begin a process of restoration. “My group is affirmation from God that I was not meant to do this alone and that I don’t have to,” says Tonya.

And that’s how she connects.

Darling Murray Connect Group

Occupation: BCL! Coordinator

Favorite Movie: A Walk To Remember

Darling Murray is a busy young woman. She is the BCL! Coordinator here at Summit, babysits for her neighbor’s 3-year-old daughter several times per week, and has a slew of other responsibilities. Even with all that going on she still makes her Summit Connect group a priority, because it helps to keep her sane!

“My community helps me to stay grounded when the winds of life attempt to knock me down,” says Darling, who leads an all girls’ Connect group. Members range from ages 20 to 29. Her group has helped her to slow down and love other people better, which is hard to do in a world where “being busy” is looked upon as the greatest thing you can do with your life.

Darling loves that the girls in her group are willing to open up and be vulnerable with each other. They openly share their struggles and pray together, which is her favorite part of the group’s weekly meetings. She also loves hanging out with the girls outside of group time. Recently one of them hosted a game night complete with pizza, drinks, and, yes, chocolate!

Although many people agree that community is a good thing, it is not always easy to find it. That’s why Darling loves Summit Connect. It’s a great vehicle to get into meaningful relationships.

“It is impossible to walk into Summit on a Sunday, listen to a sermon (as awesome as it is), walk out, and do it again next week and expect to build community,” she says. “If you aren’t doing things outside of Summit on a Sunday it is difficult to really know a person on a deeper level. The Summit Connect group gets you to a place where you have the opportunity to begin building those relationships.”

For Darling, it’s not a matter of people wanting to be in a Connect group. Everyone needs to be in one, she insists.

“It is so true that we weren’t meant to do life alone,” she says with a smile. “You need to be in a Summit Connect group because it will help you grow, but also because there are people here at Summit who don’t know you and they need to. You need to be there to help them grow as well and to love them. Nobody can offer that group what you have… Nobody.”

And that’s how Darling connects.

Christina Walker reGROUP

Jon Gray Connect Group

Jenny Winderbaum Connect Group

Scott & Laura Cook Connect Group

Hobbies: Working on creative projects together, cooking, traveling, dining out

Scott and Laura Cook are a recently married couple who feel blessed to be in a Summit Connect group at this new stage in life. Their Connect group is comprised of young, married couples. Some of the couples have been married up to 5 years and others, like Scott and Laura, just got married this year.

“Everyone in our Connect group is in similar places in life, which is really nice and allows us all to relate in many areas,” says the couple, who joined the group a few months after being engaged. “It’s been awesome to be in a group with other couples who have been married longer than us to encourage us, support us, and walk with us as we begin our life together.”

Scott and Laura have many friends who attend Summit, but Laura believes that being in a Connect group is a totally separate experience from just “having friends”. It provides you with a support system that, as she says, “is more personal, vulnerable, and relational than you could have by just going to Summit on Sundays.”

Scott and Laura’s Connect group studies hard – they just finished a study on the book of Romans – but they also play hard as well. One night they set aside their study and decide to play board games! The couple loves that deep friendships were created as a result of being in the Connect group.

The Brosts believe everyone should be in a Connect group. Not only has it created life-long relationships for the newlyweds, but it also gives them a sense of ownership in the church.

“Not only are we making new friendships, but we’re learning about God as we do it. Naturally, this forms an appreciation for and a comfort level with this group of people that we would never have by just saying ‘hi’ to friends after church,” they say. “If it weren’t for Connect groups we wouldn’t have the personal feeling of ownership and excitement of what God is doing at Summit every time we walk through its doors.”

And that’s how they connect.